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  • in reply to: After being strong for so long, now, I am paralyzed by fear #85221
    wow90
    Participant

    Thanks Anita – I appreciate your post.

    in reply to: Fantasizing about the past #72302
    wow90
    Participant

    Ashley,

    Thanks for your post! I’m glad to know that I’m not the only one who does this. And you are so right, it feels like an out of body experience.

    I think mine stems from (and this is going to sound weird) knowing how much progress I’ve made, but grieving the fact that not only was I treated like I didn’t matter, but that I wasn’t far enough along in my journey to know and recognize this. I guess it is just a desire to change the past, and wanting to be seen for exactly who I am, not some trauma based version of myself. Feels like a missed opportunity, and I’m having trouble getting over it. Although, I am well aware that if you spend time dwelling on missed opportunities, you will miss the ones right in front of you!

    I know the right thing to do, logically, but my emotions haven’t caught up yet.

    in reply to: Creating a new life without sabotage #64814
    wow90
    Participant

    Alana-

    Thanks for commenting, this resonated with me. I don’t think I would call myself a victim—the word doesn’t feel right in my mouth. I think I’ve moved somewhat past that. But yes, I kind of do feel robbed of my time. I’m not sure how I will move past that, as there are a lot of things that I haven’t experienced yet, and that weighs on my mind a lot. For example, love (romantic). I find this constant pressure to be not helpful at all, and oftentimes, it just causes me to freeze up and do nothing at all. It has prevented me from enacting positive change in my life in the past. I wonder what the cure for this is—this being, the constant pressure to experience because of feeling “robbed”?

    I think if I can get that under control, I will have a lot more peace.

    in reply to: Creating a new life without sabotage #64771
    wow90
    Participant

    Life is hope–Thank you for this comment. I actually finalized my moving plans yesterday, so it’s going to happen. I am scared, but I hope I will be able to carve out a decent way of life for myself. Your post is encouraging.

    in reply to: Any experience with energy healing? #64129
    wow90
    Participant

    Mussen, Matt & Will, thanks so much for your responses. Sorry for replying so late, I kind of forgot that I had posted this.

    I am working on self compassion for the abandoned child in me, which is getting better. But, I was pretty heavily abused until I was 20 years old, and did not start therapy until I was 21 (I’m 22 now), so this is all pretty new to me. I am having trouble having compassion for the me of a year ago. I was very embarrassing and hard to deal with. I was in so much pain, and I did not even know it.

    I have been working with meditation a lot, so I guess I was kind of wondering if energy healing was the next step or something. I’m found all sorts of audio that I really like. I once meditated away a headache, which was pretty awesome. And yes Will, I was talking about Reiki and things like that 🙂

Viewing 5 posts - 1 through 5 (of 5 total)