Hello!

Do not apologize for the length! You have come here to ask for guidance and some understanding and we are here to help you! First and foremost, I respect your attempts at forgiving not only him, but yourself. Sometimes we forget that forgiveness comes from within and it is very essential to acknowledge that. Also, I completely understand the pain and heartbreak you are going through, as I have met plenty of guys online (most long-distance). I am currently seeing someone who lives about 30-45 away from I, and we both have originally met through social media. The problem is that I will be going home for the summer and the next year due to my classes and school ending (transferring and such), and our relationship will be about a 3-hour-distance. I find this frightening; we are in the early stages of getting to know each other and that distance can cause some great damage if a good foundation is not built. So I empathize and know the struggles you are going through trying to heal because that foundation was never built between you two.

We are only human, and make mistakes. He may or may not have been confused about who he wanted to be with, and like you said, chose the one closer and more convenient to him. But he also may have had intentions that were not true or genuine and surely would have not made you happy in the long run. You have to remember that you two created a relationship that was strictly through the use of technology…no human contact was ever made between you two. He could have been someone you instantly knew was not for you, but because you both never met in person, you hold onto this false idea or belief that he was someone you could have been happy with (I’ve done it many times and am still trying to learn my lesson).

The best advice I can offer you is that life does in fact go on, and that there is someone out there for you. I believe in something greater than ourselves. I believe in God and I believe in fate, and I know there is someone out there for me. But we also go through many relationships in the meantime to learn more about ourselves and more about other people. I know it hurts now and the pain can be unbearable at times, but this healing process becomes a very valuable lesson and one that you can hold onto for the rest of your life. Focus on improving things in your life and just be content with the fact that you are alive and well, ready to take on every new day that comes your way.

Letting go is one of the hardest things we can do for ourselves, because we hold onto “what if” or “why”?, when really we need to focus on closure and acceptance. Things don’t work out the way we want to in life, but that’s…life. First you must seek happiness from within yourself and then you can find and provide happiness for others. He is doing what he has to do to get by, and so will you. Take a deep breath, everything will. be. okay. 🙂

~Namaste~