I found this post to be beyond helpful! thanks so much! I have been trying to find a ‘closure’ myself, for about 9 months. First, I couldn’t let go because it felt like I was being disloyal to the relationship. Now I need to let go, but I keep wanting to go back to this relationship. It was my first and deepest love and I can’t understand why it broke the way it did. I did everything right… I was there.. I gave all of myself for the first time in my life. Unfortunately, this situation became untenable and the other person had to be done with me for their own reasons. As I wanted only my love back, I would have done anything to get the relationship back. As expected, it didnt work out that way. After a lot of therapy, I am figuring out that I am not without my own issues, but that I did exactly what I needed to in order to make this work. I needed closure. My therapist has offered several ideas on what or how this happen, but it hasn’t brought me the relief from the pain I have felt both physically and emotionally. How cleansing to read this post and understand that I probably will never understand the why’s and what if’s. But to know that I can move on and be ok, myself, to open myself to another love? to not NEED the closure? is a relief. Thank you so much. 🙂