Hey Anita.. How are you doing ? I am having a bad day today. Its the time of the month I guess. My little one is giving me a hard time now  a days. Its been happening since last year once she started kindergarten. She keeps throwing fit for every little thing. From waking up in the morning to the time she goes to bed. She wants control over everything she does. Now a days she  talks back and saying really mean things to us. Its hurting my mental health. Recently, I stopped talking to my neighbor as she is busy with her other set of friends/ group. She misses my neighbor kid. She wants to meet her everyday. Lets name her T. She did the same thing last year too. She always want to play with X everyday even after playing with kids at school. But X is also busy with her own friends. My kid keeps saying that she is alone and X as lot of friends .I put my ego aside, two weeks ago I asked my neighbor to send her kid to our house. She said yes and didnt send her. Later texted on saying that they slept. During the weekend, I wanted to arrange a play date and asked her again. She said she has plans with her group and she wants to go with them to the park as thier kids come along. It hurt me so much. I hate her now. I am trying to distance myslef from her. but my little one keeps reminding about T. I hate it. She has time to meet her group of friend very often like three four times in a week. But she doesnt have time for me now. I  am trying to move on but my kid always reminds me about her.

I am doing OK.

Lol..Sometimes I am stubborn just like my kid. Only forgiving her will give me the peace. Thats what I noticed in the last couple of weeks. I was at peace when I forgave her but I still dont like her. I have to let go off the expectations too.

lol. It sounds easy but hard to do.

I have been with 3 friends till now. I feel like they change when they find someone new. So, I am tired of these  friendships and this friend is really hard to let go . Yeah, I dont want her in my life if she dont want to put the effort of meeting us. Right now I am angry with her that she said yes to this group and no to us. This has happened in more than couple of instances. How do I regulate my anger now. By forgiving her ?

He want to meet people and I want to stay away from people for a little while.

For the past 6 years . My anxiety was effecting only ME. Now this anger is effecting my relationships. I never felt this much anger before in my life.

I wish had a NORMAL childhood so that I dont have to go through this.