Tiny Wisdom: On Conflict

“Peace of mind is not the absence of conflict from life, but the ability to cope with it.” -Unknown

There are some days when I want everything to stop.

I want the calls to stop, the emails to stop, the requests to stop, the expectations to stop, the confrontations to stop, and the struggles to stop. Essentially, I want everything to feel quiet and easy.

Then I realize that if everything stopped, life would be boring, uneventful, and static.

If everything stopped, I wouldn’t have any opportunities to create, grow, learn from other people, or share what I’ve learned with them. Life would not be peaceful–life just wouldn’t be happening.

What I really want on those chaotic days isn’t for the world to stop. I just want to stop seeing the world as a million fires I need to put out. I want to stop interpreting everything as a conflict or crisis. I want to stop living life in a constant state of reaction, and instead focus on the actions that matter to me.

I suspect that’s what we all want: the ability to nurture a sense of peace that doesn’t crumble every time our circumstances get challenging.

The truth is we can access that on any day we choose to. We just need to choose–and then keep choosing instead of responding with stress, fear, and angst.

Today if your world seems less than peaceful, remind yourself: I can deal with whatever happens outside me. It starts by taking responsibility for what happens inside.

Photo by mahalaie

About Lori Deschene

Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha. She started the site after struggling with depression, bulimia, c-PTSD, and toxic shame so she could recycle her former pain into something useful and inspire others do the same. She recently created the Breaking Barriers to Self-Care eCourse to help people overcome internal blocks to meeting their needs—so they can feel their best, be their best, and live their best possible life. If you’re ready to start thriving instead of merely surviving, you can learn more and get instant access here.

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