Thanks Mr. monklet80 for your reply 🙂

Yes you are right that love is not always going to be easy. For me, to understand love, you have to think with love. A simple rule i follow in my life. But yeah i am also a human being i also get frustrated, angry, sad etc. if you are kind to someone and they take your kindness as weakness then what to do ? especially in case of loved ones. I don’t want to hurt him with my words and actions. But this all happens intentionally or unintentionally.

Sometimes i thought that maybe i should work with more patience and courage. But most of the time, i feel lost,alone and feel no courage at all. When he gets angry, he makes me feel like draining my energy.

Fight at night, and the other day he becomes normal. Talking normally and doesn’t feel any guilty for whatever bad he does to me.

I asked him many times to just leave me forever, but he says that he don’t wants to leave. He just wants to live life according to him.
Once, his friend offered me to drop me to the bus stop. I accepted because he was also my class friend, we both are not so frank with each other but he respects me alot. He just wanted to help me, he never said a word to me. Only picked me from one stop and dropped on another.

When i told my boyfriend about this, he got jealous and fought with me by saying that you left me for some moments. Oh God, that day i was feeling dying inside. i could not tell what i was going through when he was talking shit to me.

Then i said sorry to him and promised him that i will never ever do it again without his permission.
But now 2 days before, he made me mad by talking to my friend at night while that time i was crying madly. I got angry that why is he doing all this to me. He didn’t even cared that i was crying.