Dear JJC:

What I already suggested to you was of no help to you. There is one possible solution that neither did I nor did anyone else here suggested to you, so I will here:

Stop wanting to get out of this marriage. Give in to it. Relax into it best you can. Clearly wanting to get out of it for thirty five long years has produced zero results.

Sometimes it makes sense to give up and give in. This may be best for your well being, in the absence of any success otherwise.

anita