Sunnyside, As regards the timeline your understanding is not exactly right but close enough. To be more precise, the 10 year gap is the time difference between when I met my wife and when things became intimate with my friend. I didn’t marry my wife until after a couple of years and didn’t start the other relationship until a few years after we met. Consequently, the timeline between when I got married and when the affair started is probably around 6 years give or take a little. As regards your other question about confiding in someone, this is something I have never really done and have always kept problems to myself. Only recently have I started to open up a little as I have been overwhelmed and recognise how bad things became in terms of my mental state.