so there are no online classes for java. i have been currently doing meditations and i find that my brain is more focused and i can tune out some of the irrelevant chatter. my guidance counselor said it would be unwise to drop the class since i have a 94 in it mostly due to tests. also since we only have only 2 months (counting december), i could probably make it through. there is christmas break after dec. 23. i will probably stay after with the teacher to catch up with the other projects i need to work on. ch. 6 on control statements in java makes more sense to me and i find that i can at least get a decent code written that works. my friend ray was also helping check my code as well. i think i received at least a 90 on my u.s history ii quiz and also i feel ready for the ap calc quiz on area under curve. i studied for it over the weekend and i should be okay if i meditate and keep calm. the chromosome mapping makes more sense to me for ap biology and andrew was also helping me with it. i still need to practice on figuring out what genes go where, but i’m understanding the concepts behind them so it won’t be long. also the meditation has helped me feel happier about myself and there are times when i sense the inner bully, i can uproot it with a few words from my inner angel. i imagine my inner angel radiating a fire and burning the inner bully to ashes and then i say “no inner bully i will not listen to your lies. for i am the one in control of my life. i am completely mind-boggled by science b/c there is a thing called Chrispr and it allows genes to be translated from another organism to a human. so we may have a chimpanzee give birth to a human since they are similar in genotypes. we could just change a few gene letters in the chimpanzee and implant an embryo in the chimpanzee and it may produce a human. i think the chimpanzee producing a human is a bit unethical. but that science is recent, so it needs more improvements, but i still think it’s cool. they recently have figured out how to isolate the genes of mosquitoes that carry diseases and possibly use that in a vaccination for people. also there are codes in your dna that code for specific traits in a mating partner. so if a guy passed on the interest of girls to a girl that girl could be gay. i respect people no matter whatever sexual orientation, but science is really cool in the way certain genes with ‘personality’ codes can be passed down. however ‘personality’ codes aren’t in the genome for good, you can change your attitude, but there is still a part of you that might act a certain way or prefer someone based on the genes you inherited. so i was thinking about the people that i’ve had crushes on in the past and what they have in common dave and i shared a platonic love (it wasn’t a crush, but he still fits with the list):

All came in at a time when I was struggling (robert helped me with my multiplication tables and also made my gym class more fun, brandon helped me when i was bullied in sixth grade, griffin (my special friend) helped me in seventh grade and andrew helped me in my classes in eleventh grade and still continues to)

All of them have a sense of humor and are laid back

All of them are athletic and modest (well brandon sometimes bragged, but it wasn’t too mean, griffin also does now and then, but it also isn’t being selfish)

All of them are helpful (andrew is often where anyone needs him, if someone needs help with something he’ll be there. griffin will defend me behind my back and help cheer me up)

All of them are smart in some way (brandon was good at tool working, griffin is good at coming up with ways to study and andrew is just of many talents)

All of them are optimistic (especially griffin and andrew, they are always laughing and enjoying life)

All of them enjoy nature (andrew likes camping, griffin enjoys going hiking)

All of them are still my friends today and i see andrew and griffin the most

All of them are competitive and independent (in mostly a good way, sometimes andrew can be competitive and it will be stressful)

All of them are understanding and compassionate (i can be a bit irritated or dramatic at times, but they still find me fun to be around)

All of them helped me be more confident (steve was a shy person and he’s currently in my ap calc class, but we used to help each other with our science hw in seventh grade and we often laughed at math jokes in eleventh grade lunch and now in class, andrew is a confident person himself, both griffin and brandon helped me when i couldn’t stand up for myself)

All of them like science and reading (brandon and andrew like nonfiction, while griffin and i enjoy all types, andrew is the most scientific)

All of them let me be myself:D