Hi Selizabeth. Firstly, I want to say well done for having the courage to speak out about your thoughts and feelings and seek help. It is not an easy thing to do. I also want to say well done for taking the first step and wanting to be able to appreciate yourself for who you are based on your own feelings. You are not alone when you speak of feeling this way. There are many other people with the same beliefs about themselves. I myself, had the same beliefs a few years ago. I now love and appreciate myself for who I am and am so grateful and blessed for everything I have in my Life. And most importantly, I am now able to love myself unconditionally, even with flaws that I may feel have. I am telling you this as I want you to see that it is possible to totally change your mind set and thoughts about yourself and your life.

If we base our self esteem on others, we will never truly be happy or feel that feeling of gratefulness about ourselves. This does not come from outside sources, only from within. Another thing that I want to say is that nothing that goes wrong, is because of your appearance. There are many many reasons why things can go wrong, sometimes its because of outside reasons and sometimes they just do. It is not aways our job to understand this.

Have you ever tried a Gratitude Journal? These can help you notice things that you are grateful for every day and help shift your thoughts into a more positive place. Another thing that you could do is Visualisation exercises. They consist of picturing your life the way you want it, (it helps to write these things down also so you can clearly see it in front of you). Picturing important scenarios turning out successfully and also repeating Positive affirmations to yourself daily. Also, every time you have a negative thought about yourself, replace it with a positive one. Something about yourself that makes you feel happy. If you can’t think of anything, just say the opposite of the thought that you had. You don’t have to believe it at the time and you may feel silly saying it but just remember, no one can hear you. You are just reaffirming to yourself, something positive rather than something negative. This will help you shift your negative thought patterns into positive ones. Another good exercise to do would be an “Allow and Release Exercise”. This consists of you being fully in your emotions so you are able to work through them rather than bury or fight them. I think you need to get to the core of why you are feeling this way. You will then be able to positively change your thoughts permanently about your self-esteem.

I am a Mindfulness/Life Coach. I can help you with this free of charge if it is something you would like.
You can contact me on:
Email: trucolours@hotmail.co.uk
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TruHigherVibeLiving
Instagram: trucolours_on_insta

Good luck on your journey Selizabeth

Natalie