Dear Carolin Lim:

You are welcome, anytime. it is a pleasure communicating with you.

Regarding your question: “do you think there is any way, any chance for such stubborn person to change his own self for the better without anyone’s help?”- extremely small chance. Maybe as a result of a brain injury (I am not joking). Very, very unlikely. He lies to every person in his life, doesn’t he? And has done so for many years. This is a mental habit deeply rooted, and it benefits him. There is the habit, and the payoff. What would be his motivation to invest the massive amounts of time and hard work that are required to slowly weaken these mental habits, resist his compulsions to lie, manipulate and misuse people?

When he loses one person (you), he is not going to change so to win you back- set his life straight, do right by everyone he harmed, come clean with everyone- no, he is going to “win” another woman instead, and still, another. He will make up for the loss of you.

And so it goes…

anita