Thanks Anita.

Yes I am scared ….that is true…but I am scared of below two things Anita

1. Though I never expected to stay, i got to stay(we both lied so much to others for  this) believing its my responsibility to save him, so I been there like his second wife(of course i love him too much) in always of showing my love and care. So can a wife leave husband to his hell….so I am scared of that GUILT is it right or not. So what I mean is, if I would have been happy in his house then for sure I would have not been thinking of to leave him right. So now I am finding reasons to justify myself to clear the GUILT of leaving…this is scaring me Anita.

2. Yes I am scared to live alone now and cannot even breath myself relax for the fear of painful days…but for sure I never go back to him for my selfishness(even though I madly love him I do not expect others pray).

So to start thinking of my second scare, first I need come out from my first scare.

Hope I am able to express my pain. Thanks once again Anita.