Hi Kelsey,

I can very much relate to your post. I will have a very close friend and then I meet another person, who then becomes close. I too, am a very giving person. I go out of my way to be there for them..to listen to their problems. Then there comes a time, that they are doing all the complaining, and I am doing all the listening..and as soon as I want to talk, they interrupt, and say they “have to go” I feel like a doormat and become resentful. Its usually or always me that calls them and invites them to lunch or dinner. Yet, neither one calls me and invites me out.

Then what happens is I introduce the both of them, and they become close, and suddenly, I am left out. I lost my car due to being on SSDI disability. My one friend bought a car. She would never ask me along. I would go upstairs and watch TV with them, and they would get real quiet and just look at each other. Then one would say, she had to go to bathroom..the other would say she had to call her boyfriend and leave, and I would catch them getting in the car and leaving together. I felt so left out, rejected, like I was not good enough. Then I would get paranoid. I finally had enough and decided I did not want any contact with either of them. This was hard, because we all lived in housing together. They would try to talk to me, I would just give them a quick smile. Instead of watching television with them upstairs, I would watch movies in the residents social room downstairs. I told myself never again, would I introduce two friends too each other, because I end up getting left out. The one girl got evicted, the other girl and I did manage some sort of friendship, but it wasn’t the same. She moved out. Never said bye to me. Haven’t heard from her for a year. Then the other day, some residents told me she came to visit me (I wasn’t here) to take me to lunch. She just left a note in my mail folder at front desk but did not leave her phone number, saying “perhaps some other time”. Having two close friends treat me this way, makes me feel I am back in Junior High School again. It just hurts.