Anita,

Thank you for the helpful feedback. I understand very clearly your point for now.

But understanding and changing are 2 different things though. My mother had used fear for the longest time as a motivation for me to survive. How can I replace fear with some other type of motivation?

and also,

I want to share something with you that has nothing to do with my parents. I noticed that my ex partner had deleted his Facebook today. His Facebook was filled with his friends from our university and also photos related to his major and student council.

I know what this means – that he is probably accepted in his new university. I am feeling quite a lot of emotions. I guess that I was hoping that we would have a chance of getting back together if he hadn’t been accepted. That maybe I will still have a chance to see his face around the campus next semester too. By deleting his Facebook, I know that he is not coming back next semester. I think he had also resigned from his position in student council.

My heart feels very heavy, I want to congratulate him but I am hesitant for a lot of reasons. This feels even more final than that time when I forgot my anniversary with him. He is closing a chapter in his life, that has me in it and it feels very painful. I had seen it coming months ago, still, it does not make it easier for me.

Why do I feel like he is deleting me from his life as he is deleting his Facebook? It was a stupid Facebook account that he never even really updates due to his busy schedule but it was something that connected us together as friends, as past lovers. Whatever our relationship are right now.

Any advice regarding this?

-Mina

• This reply was modified 7 years, 3 months ago by Mina.