Dear Luna:

You shared that you spend a lot of time in bed or on the sofa because of a health condition, unable to get out and to exercise. You saw your now ex boyfriend about once a week for a year and a half (I imagine he visited you in your home), and communicated with him daily. He was your only and best friend. He said he wants to remain your friend but you are afraid that if and when he has another woman in his life, you will feel further hurt. Your anguish over this breakup further hurts your health.

My suggestion: look into possibilities in your life, as limited as it is. Look for something new that you can do, a routine of sorts that is new to you. For example, you can start each day with a guided meditation of your choosing, something to fit the beginning of a day, and you can end each day with a guided meditation of your choosing, something to fit the ending of a day. You can incorporate, perhaps, a limited, relaxing yoga exercise at any one or several times a day, an exercise you can perform at home, one that will not harm you but help you.

There are many other things you can incorporate into your day, nothing too small or insignificant as long as it is well thought of. Focus on your well-being, on being as calm as you can, returning to calm when distressed.

Regarding your ex boyfriend and possibility of being friends with him, that is a tough one. Maybe you can put it into a trial and error test, try to be friends for a week or two, see how it feels. Later you may experiment with no contact with him and see how that feels.

Post again anytime you’d like.

anita