Dear Alexandra:

Good morning to you too.

Your sister keeps drilling into you the  message that you are in the  wrong, that you are psychologically not balanced, I think is the term she used, telling you that you are wrong to cry when watching Awakening (one of my favorite movies of all times, by the way), that you are wrong… wrong, wrong. In the last part of your recent post you suggested a solution, an alternative to my suggested no contact with her. Your suggested solution is to not take what she tells you to heart (“not… take things she says to me to heart like I normally do”)

I think that it is too late for that: what she says, the message that you are in the wrong, is something already in your heart, well established. It is a core belief that is guiding your life and has been guiding your life for many years.

Will you do this little exercise and let me know how it goes for you: close your eyes, when calm, and imagine your sister looking at you with a smile, with loving eyes, approving of you, telling you that she likes who you are, that you are okay in her book. See her smiling at you with approving eyes.

How does it make you feel, this imagery?

anita