Lucas,

Good that you are aware of what works for you and what you don’t want for yourself.

I cannot help but notice of all the ideas I gave in my response to your post that you chose to respond to only one which your rejected because it is too uncomfortable for you to try.

It sounds that you’d rather wait for the right person in order to change than do the inner work for yourself.  Perhaps what it comes down to is that I haven’t met the right person yet.

You talk about wanting to come across as self confident and self assured and therefore it is too risky to try to be genuine.  I know that most people are not fooled by what we try to project and who we really are.  Our energy and body language gives us away of what is really going on inside.

Change is uncomfortable and can be scary.  Staying in our stuckness is familiar and safe.  I understand that being highly anxious is a daunting challenge to do anything.

I wish you well in your journey.

Mark