Hello Lucas,

I do understand your feeling. I have felt depressed most of my life and I do “enjoy” this feeling. It’s something I know… kind of comforting in a way… but I am working very hard to break this cycle since it is not healthy and I want to be happy most of the time at one point in my life. Since you are here, I feel that is your goal too. 🙂

The first thing you need to know is that you are not alone. A lot of people are in unhealthy patterns. You are not a bad person because of that. You’re just human. The good news is that you are aware of it and you want to change things.

Are you in therapy? If not, I would suggest you to seek the help of a professional to break the pattern. Are there free services in your city/country for this? If so, there is usually a long waiting time but still worth a try, don’t you think?

Why would you think you do not deserve happiness? I understand that so many people suffer on Earth but making you feel bad does not help them. You could take some time to help the people in need and do some volunteering? That’s just a thought 🙂 I did for some time and it did help a bit.

I wish you the best of luck Lucas. Let us know if you feel better this week!

Have a good one.

Stephie