Hi Bella

What do you mean by “emotionally dependency”? Are you saying that your sense of self is tied up in having your emotions validated by someone other then yourself?  Or are you saying you needed a safe place to share your emotions and without that safe place find yourself wondering who you are?

In Zen there is the concept of Two Minds — the thinking mind and the observing mind. Most of our psychological and emotional stress happens because our Thinking Mind and Observing Mind are “fused” and we don’t recognize the difference.

For example. We have a experience that leaves us feeling sad and then we become sad.  We say ‘I’ am sad and doing so mistake our thoughts and our feelings for who we are.

Our emotions can teach us a great deal about how our experiences are influencing us so its very important to feel them, however it is a error to mistake our sense of self as ‘being’ our emotions, or our thoughts. “You” are not your emotions or your thinking,,,,,

Why We Need to Stop Judging Our Feelings