That feels very, very true and real to me. Also in the ways I want to keep a distance there is a similarity. For example, I do not want to be overly close to my dad because it makes me feel uncomfortable and like it’s too little too late. He and my mom seem to get along better now that the kids are out of the house but it still seems like an odd, materialistic life of keeping up with the neighbors.

I wouldn’t be able to be with the married man because I would not be able to fully trust him, would probably still be jealous and i would forever feel like an actual homewrecker. This has really been eye opening since I have not been able to really tell anyone except for a couple friends who think I just had a crush and that’s it.