Surving30,

I am confused.  A few years ago, you got involved with a man who sexually assaulted you?  Now you are involved with this loving man for the last 11 months but cannot stop thinking about your ex husband?  Or you cannot stop thinking about the man who assaulted you?

If it is the ex husband, how long have you been divorced and not been in contact with him?

If it is the abusive boyfriend then how long has it been since you been in contact him?

For either case, my guess is that you never really been emotionally out on your own since your marriage.  You jumped right into this abusive guy and now with this loving guy.

You don’t know how to be able to stand on your own two emotional feet without a man.  I think that whatever the attraction this abusive man is for you, it is a piece that needs to be examined within yourself.  What about this ex that you miss?  What qualities does he have that you long for and that your current boyfriend does not have?

Mark