Dear noname:

The reason your great efforts, trying so hard as you do, do not bring you the results that you need, is that you are trying hard where it is impossible to succeed. It is similar to a person trying really hard to get to the other side of a mountain by circling a lake nearby. As hard as the person tries, and as long as he does, he will not get to the other side of the mountain;it takes climbing the mountain (or walking around the mountain) to get to the other side.

Helping other people is not working for you because it is what you did your whole life, within your family of origin. It didn’t work for you then, still doesn’t. And extending the helping to everyone else is not working and cannot work for you.

It is the hope that it will work that keeps you going, but it keeps going on miserably. Helping others as you have done is like circling the lake, the hope cannot be actualized.

Climbing the mountain, or walking around it to the other side is about helping yourself. It is about taking your own side in life, choosing you. Figuring that your well being is your primary responsibility and your job and that you deserve help no less than any other person in the whole wide world.

It is time that someone will attend to that neglected boy. He needs you and you need him. Don’t keep neglecting him as you focus on others. Attend to him, earn his trust and he will cooperate you wonderfully: you will feel good. You will have peace and love, if you put your efforts where it is possible to succeed.

anita