Dear Anita,
No I do not anymore. I am conscious now and have clarity. The more clarity I gained about my mother and her abuse the more I gained about my own self and traits. Hence all of our posts for 2 years now. But that doesn’t mean I am bounced back now of course. I am not by any means remorseful for what I did or even aware of it. I just float through life and focus on my thoughts and healing – like what I do with you.
My definition – wow that’s tough. I see it as loving someone more than even your own self. Putting their needs first. Feeling for them and not getting your own hang ups in the way.
Perhaps I do not know as I can not access much emotion as it is mostly repressed. As you said the most or even only accessible emotion is anger. But all else is beaten down or out of me.
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 