I am a white girl who was involved with a South Asian. While with me, I found out he was courting “suitable” women on the side to appease his parents (suitable meaning same culture, caste, religion … as well as light skinned and virgin). I joined this forum to try and make sense of that. It’s been years now and I still haven’t. I will personally never understand the reasonings of some people from this background.

You are in a situation that is even MORE ideal that I was … and it still isn’t working out. I can’t answer that. No one can. There is a bond between Indian males and doing what their parents want that can’t be broken. It is duty to them. The only feedback I can give you is that at least this was just a six-month courtship. It sounds like you developed feelings but it probably won’t take long to get past them (in comparison, I was with my guy for two years; he would have continued had I not confronted him).

When someone shows you who they are, believe them. This guy is not going to change. You are never going to get closure. I know this won’t help you now, but I guarantee that a year from now, you will be thankful it ended when it did.

I wish you well. I know this hurts.

I would recommend the following:

– Google “arranged marriage” and “TinyBuddha” for other topics that came up regarding this.

– Check out this website: http://madh-mama.blogspot.com/2015/07/when-your-indian-boyfriend-leaves-you_31.html

There are thousands of stories just like ours online. No one ever has the answers.