Dear Anita,

Thank you so much for your answer.

I guess now is the time to think things through and the more conscious I am of the processes the better. So, yes, I colaborated for the situation in my marriage, since I felt so bad but kept postponing a decision. It took me some time to understand that his way of acting was because he didnt really love me anymore – not only because of his emotional problems. He had an abusive, violent father, sometimes got really depressed but never went to get prefessional help.

It hurts still – to remember how tied up I was – and I blame myself for letting the situation last as much as it did . One day, my daughter asked me ” Mom, why don’t you divorce him?” And I answered at that time that I didn’t have the necessary strenght.

I had reached a point where the only thing I could do was cry. But when I realized that it was over, I told him to leave the house and that was it. I have no regrets. I am at peace with my decision.

So what now? I think I’ll keep trying to change this mental habit and keep my eyes really open in case some guy comes along. What about meditation? Can it help me?

Flávia