Dear Madeline:

“She sees something wrong, but doesn’t work on it or say anything”- this is the problem as I see it. She feels wrong about something but… feels that she is a bad person for feeling this way, critical of herself, self doubting, so she says nothing, but the problem doesn’t go away, so she tries the resolve the problem without expressing how she feels and what she thinks.

I think that she thinks that what  she  thinks and feels is unacceptable, so she hides these things. Maybe if you find a way to share with her more  of your thoughts and feelings that you find unacceptable somehow, including sharing this unacceptable element,  maybe it will encourage her to share her own thoughts and feelings that she believes are unacceptable.

anita