Hi John,

I’m wondering if this girl came into your life when you were especially sad, lost, lonely, and needy, and that all those feelings made you desperate to have her move in with you so you’d have someone with you 24/7 to help take away your pain. So although she knew she was giving up a great living situation to move in with you, the promises you made to her back then convinced her to do it anyway. Both of you believed back then that there was a bright future ahead of you together. You now know that it’s not meant to be, now realizing your mistake, and you feel guilty about what you need to do to fix this mistake.

I could be totally wrong but if this is what happened I understand completely how you feel. This happens all the time. Couples move in together, give up nice homes to build one together thinking it’s going to work out fine, but it doesn’t much of the time. Your mistake was making a life-changing decision that affects you, your kids, your gf, and her kids, all when you were struggling emotionally, not thinking clearly. People do this all the time. It doesn’t make you a bad person.

B