Hey Liz.

A couple of thoughts that may help as you work through this. I have a partner who is naturally very introverted and it took me a while to learn that we simply had different love languages – mine much more physical and expressive.  I mention this as when I went through an insecure phase, it made me question the relationship in a similar way, whereas when I resolved my own self-esteem issues, I just didn’t have the same questions about the relationship. A long-winded way of getting to the point that it is not unreasonable in the slightest to want to feel connected both emotionally and physically with whoever you choose as your life partner – but that it is worth making sure you are talking the same language and that it is truly issues with the relationship and not with your own confidence etc. Talk to him, talk some more, observe to see if his actions meet his words – if it is just different way of expressing yourselves, that is something you can work through but if he is just not willing to make any effort or further deeper emotional commitment, then you have your choice on whether to settle for less.  Are there other areas of your life outside the relationship to focus on, so as it is not expected to fulfill 100% of your needs..