Dear Anita,

Hello, did you end up getting some rest yesterday? You did make perfect sense about your comment when we last spoke.  I pondered it a lot.  The concept of having a right to vocalize what is appropriate for yourself.  Such as having someone clean up after themselves, or vocalizing that you are busy, and unable to be as involved as you would like.

The concept of guilt should not have a place there if you are being your most authentic self.  But of course it often does, especially if you are like me – and have been “motivated” and pressured by guilt my whole life.  To the point that I may not see certain actions as guilt oriented, but more that it seems “habit.”

It is important to dissect “habits” as to what they really are.  Is it habitual simply because the same fearful narrative keeps playing in your head over and over?

Where is the “habit” and pattern? In the brain, or the action?