Anita,

yes I hear what you are saying.  I believe I did not listen to his preferences.  I ignored them just to be with him.  I feel that I would ignore preferences that do not align with mine right now if I were dating and I have in the past because I’m desperate for some type of connection.  My brain goes into tunnel vision of seeing the relationship through to the end and not stopping it when things are not right.  In the past I’ve “ghosted” men mostly in college.  I would just not answer the phone and avoid them without breaking it off.  I did it several times.

i believe for me there is a difference between loneliness and wanting a connection with a man. All this stemms from my mother cutting me off emotional when I went to college I know.  I also think that during the last few years with my ex husband and being forced to sleep with him has harmed me more than I realize.  I felt like a prostitute and that I was being used in different ways during the end part of the marriage.

lindsey