Hi Tania,

I think it’s time you faced some facts.  You have both moved on from the amazing three weeks that you spent together with this man who, despite being in his mid 20’s (I guess), decided that he wasn’t looking for a relationship.  This was a polite way of saying he didn’t want to be in a relationship with you.  He wasn’t as in awe of you as you were with him.

I think it’s time you developed the seven year itch and stopped being “around” for this “what might have been” obsession that you have.  You would have been his “serious relationship” and someone else would have been his “around girlfriend”.  For some stupid reason, you are both playing the same game, and that is all it is.  The reason yoga, meditation, self help books etc. haven’t worked for you is because, pure and simply, you don’t want them to.

The fact is that you have already lost MJ.  You just haven’t had closure.  You can’t possibly continue a friendship with this man that you keep obsessing over.  He is a threat to everything that you should be holding dear – your marriage, your husband, your future, which may or may not include the children that you have been discussing.

Look back fondly on this romance by all means but, for your own sake, put it where it belongs, firmly in the past.

Peggy