Dear Lily:

It’s been sunny and warm here too, too hot at times when outside. You did an excellent job this last week and Saturday you did something you wanted to do for a long time, going to the sea and sending a-message-in-a-bottle.

The advice you gave to your friend regarding her mother is the advice I would give, meaning I think it is an excellent advice.

You wrote: “These days I am feeling better about myself and much calmer. But I am also quite lonely”- when we are less anxious, what happens, is we get to feel other uncomfortable feelings that are usually forgotten underneath the whirlwind of anxiety. This is the problem with the healing process, we make progress (like you are making) but we get to feel lonely, or sad, depressed and whatnot. So one says to oneself: maybe I am not making progress after all, because I am feeling worse than usual in this way or that way.

But we are making progress, it is just that the healing process is very long, and there are many emotions that we have that need to be attended to, many challenges yet to take on. It is a very gradual, slow process and we need to be very patient and persevere.

So keep doing what you’ve been doing, appreciate the increasing calm, endure the loneliness and keep going.

anita