Dear Cali Chica:

It is very common for mistreated children to be blamed for the consequences of mistreatment. It is similar to a child being beaten, leg broken, limping and then being blamed and made fun of for limping. Your mother rushed you (and your sister) and both of you are.. well, rushed and unable to enjoy. Not a surprise. (I am guessing your father was plenty angry at his wife, but redirected his anger and unleashed it against you).

To be authentically you, to be reborn as your innate self, you need to stop rushing. There is no  other way. Notice your rushing is in all areas. Not only the social. This rushing is a reaction to having been rushed. Eliminate the “re-” from reaction and you are left with “action”- authentic action, the real you.

I will soon be going over more of my notes, add some more interpersonal skills material given me back in 2011, but let’s keep talking about this, the Rushing Factor.

If you stop the rushing, you will also stop the buildup of exhaustion which motivates you to go to the only solution you know to (temporarily) stop rushing, which is to lash out angrily.

anita