Dear Lily:

It may take some time but you will be able to spot the right man because you  will hear him talk.. a lot (he will have to be quiet sometimes, of course, so to hear what you have to say!

Yes, I remember you mentioned hitting yourself long ago. I suppose it fits with the unfortunate core belief you have (one that I had before as well) that you are wrong, or a bad person, and therefore it feels almost… right, to hurt yourself, to punish a bad person, or a person who does wrong. Am I understanding correctly?

anita