Anita,

It’s been kind of a rough morning.  It seems like stress can build up with me and I don’t realize it until it slaps me in the face.  I’m a bit more reactive, easily irritated, etc.  I don’t see these things until afterwards.   Yesterday I was  stressed out at work as mediation was at 2pm and I was worried about it.  A customer ended up asking for my supervisor complaining about me.  Mediation went ok, we just have to go back in 2 weeks to sign paperwork but it just didn’t improve my mood at all.

This morning I can see things clearly.  I was overly stressed out yesterday, was reactive at work (my reactivity has been building) and now I just feel bad about myself.  The problem is now I will be hyperaware of my reactivity and better at work with customers but in about 3 months I will start to downslide.  I just feel embarrassed- K and everyone else that sits next to me at work must have noticed.  My mom is coming next week to help with the kids because my ex is going out of town for a week.  I think the best thing to do is not really be around her much, just let her spend time with the kids.

I just feel like people around me can see my stress level and reactivity and I’m embarrassed.  I feel like I’m riding the crazy train and no one wants to be around me.

Lindsey