Hi Kat,
It sounds like your family is Pre-Grieving the immanent death of your grandmother. So your mother has no time or bandwidth to emotionally or physically take care of you. Thus the getting your life together comment. What, does she expect you to be married with a career by now? For everything to be “fine”?
It also looks like you had quite a few missed connections in Spain. Keep in mind that people romanticize the past! Was it really your spiritual home? Or was it the bittersweet emotions of all those guys? Be honest with yourself.
Don’t be surprised to find that after you meet those qualifications you will have outgrown Spain.
Sorry to be a Debbie Downer.
This reminds me of me and Vermont! Oh, Vermont! Oh, driving all that way from Maine to see my first love who was so not worthy of me! Now it’s merely a great place to ski. (Some winters.)
Best,
Inky
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 