Hi Charly,

As much as you might have regrets, you have cheated on your boyfriend and trust has been destroyed.  It may have been years ago but your boyfriend hasn’t forgiven you for it.  His words are saying that he wants to move on but his actions are saying he wants to stay.  He even wants to sleep in the same bed as you – the punishment is he doesn’t want to be intimate with you.  He becomes moody if you ask him to sleep elsewhere.  There are reasons why you cheated and I don’t see this as a one way street – it indicates that there were problems with the relationship way back when.  Perhaps he is not ready, nor ever will be, to acknowledge the root cause.  Perhaps you haven’t even discussed it.

Is your apartment rented or owned by you.  If it is rented, then give your landlord notice and find somewhere else to live.  If you own it, then give your boyfriend notice and find him somewhere else to live.  If he refuses, then consult a solicitor and see what your rights are.

Refuse to be drawn into guilt trips.  As Aiko said, if you really wanted to live separate lives then you would make it happen.

Peggy