I guess I feel like I am considered difficult or weird to handle and this gets projected on others. I have an image of how others may see me all the time with all kinds of unpleasant considerations others may use. In the past I had people who gave me the impression to trying to give me advices and support while actually being condescending and using faux consideration to subtly put me down or treat me like trash, I guess this always sticks with me in my mind