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Reply To: How do I stop caring what others think?

HomeForumsEmotional MasteryHow do I stop caring what others think?Reply To: How do I stop caring what others think?

#340132
Lily
Participant

Dear anita,

yes, I have to work on making these positive things my life habits. As I can really feel that they make me feel better!

Today at work my colleague was at an event for the majority of the day, so there were no complaints. It felt more relaxed, but also I worried about making a lot of mistakes.

The worst thing though was when a new colleague (A) came and was looking for my other colleague (B), but she wasn’t at her workplace. He told me that I should tell her to call him when she comes back. When she came back I told her and she said “Him? But I just saw him.” So I figured they must have talked. I still worried, should I remind her? But maybe it would seem like I am some sort of control freak, so I let it be.

But then A came back and he asked B questions. So apparently they hadn’t spoken. And when he left I asked B, and she confirmed that they hadn’t.

I don’t know why, but this makes me really angry! Now it seems like I am unreliable or crazy or something. But I actually cared to deliver the message and to help my colleagues the best I can. Maybe I should have asked B more about it when she said she had just seen him or stressed more that it seemed important. Once again I fail at communication.

It really frustrates me. I would like to be normal and I would like to get along with people.I feel so foolish!

Thank you for your advice regarding the conflicts between my colleagues. It makes a lot of sense to me. I cannot remember having said anything bad about my colleagues. Because I actually like my colleagues and think that they are overall good people. Just the communication needs improvement and I have criticism about how some things are handled. To my colleague, I just agreed that some things didn’t work out or what I don’t find o.K. But I also worried that I was a little too uncritical of my colleague, cause she might have played her own part in the problem as well.

Hopefully things will get better at work. I often am very insecure there… But clearly I have improved compared to one year ago!

Tomorrow I will meet my best friend again. We haven’t seen each other a lot lately and I really missed her! The last time I visited her in January at my former dormitory where she now lives (I also had to “jump over my own shadow” to do that!). Hopefully it will be a good day together!