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Reply To: Suddenly questioning my sexuality..?

HomeForumsShare Your TruthSuddenly questioning my sexuality..?Reply To: Suddenly questioning my sexuality..?

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jacky
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Hello i’ve also been feeling this way

No matter what I do I’m always reminded about how I’m questioning my sexuality, it really sucks and I just want this anxious feeling in me to go away, I started feeling this way since July 27. Im in a really good relationship with a boy (For 9 months) things have been amazing with him and I’m sexually active with him. I started questioning my sexuality while watching lesbian porn, lesbian porn turns me on a lot and it made me realize that it turns me on more than having sex with my own boyfriend. It made me feel very guilty about it. I’ve always watched lesbian porn but why am I barely questioning my sexuality now? Even when I was with my boyfriend I still watched lesbian porn but never questioned it until now. I love my boyfriend so much, and the thought of me leaving him makes me so sad and anxious and want to cry. I even told myself that I’m just bisexual or bicurious and accepted myself but for some reason this anxious feeling is still in here. I try to distract myself from this feeling but it always somehow comes back. I am afraid to go to sleep because I know I’ll go back to thinking about it, i really just want this feeling to go away because it’s destroying me. I can’t sleep, eat, do anything without being reminded of it, like I literally never questioned my sexuality up until now, but why now? I know I’m not full lesbian because I still feel attracted, and very much in love with my boyfriend and Can really only imagine myself with a man, if I imagine myself with a women i get kinda uncomfortable. I’ve always been attracted to men and felt sexually attracted to them, even a girl asked me if I was gay and I got uncomfortable and said no. I told my sister and my best friend about it and they just told me that it’s okay and I’ll be fine and I even told my boyfriend about this and he was very accepting of it. I prayed for this feeling to go away and I just really want it gone. I am so exhausted from feeling anxious I really want it to go away. I can’t get any medical help or take therapy because I’m still a teenager and don’t have any money, I don’t want to tell my parents because I know that they will brush it off and tell me to not worry about it, they wouldn’t really care. Any help or tips on how to get over this without therapy/medical help? I just really want this feeling to go away hehe