Dear anita,

I am guessing it’s because of irregular meal times, I get careless at eating meals on time. Though, I’ll take medicine if doesn’t get better!

“The child believes that she has extreme powers to destroy.”

This sentence stands for all the concerns I had in my mind that made up the “bad person” complex from the start. You couldn’t explain it better. I couldn’t even explain this to myself better. I assume I have this power to destruct with every single word and with the tiniest action, as if everything holds such a heavy weight the way it did. I have seen and lived closely with those people who attempted to take away their own lives(my mom and brother); there must have been someone else’s words or actions powerful enough to destruct so much of these peoples lives(my mom’s and brother’s). And so I have lived in constant balancing and over analyzing of each and every word because it might also DESTROY someone. The constant fear to destroy someone, to hurt someone, and to lose someone I care about.

“We do not live among extremely sensitive situations like those days, Javairia.” I must remind myself this often.

This just connects to many things. I will probably add more to it later and will answer your last question too, but I want to free my mind of other study tasks first.

I really appreciate for all that you have advised me and consoled me for more than a year until now. I really do. I wish you happiness

Regards,

Javairia