Hi anita,

Thank you for the birthday wishes! I haven’t heard anything from my family yet. Interestingly, my mom complains at me when I don’t wish her happy birthday or happy mother’s day but has forgotten my birthday for years now. Double standards are not great to deal with. Here are my lists:

Good behaviors:

Being respectful and polite to other people, even people we disagree with

Listening to listen and not just to respond

Following through with what you say you’re going to do

Apologizing for wrongdoing and not doing it again

Honesty, saying what we mean and meaning what we say. Not lying intentionally

Seeing all people on equal footing: not thinking we’re better than someone because of social status or political beliefs or other superficial things

Taking responsibility for ourselves

Caring for and loving our children unconditionally

Helping others in need to the best of our ability

Caring for ourselves so we don’t become an unfair burden on others

Respecting the boundaries of others

Caring for and loving the Earth and animals, meaning do as little harm as possible.

Bad Behaviors:

Acting in a self interested manner at all times

Lying to people to get something from them

Manipulating people to get something from them

Disrespecting other’s physical, emotional, or energetic boundaries

Doing something kind or nice just to get something in return or gain power over someone.

Dumping problems and bad energy on people, using people as an emotional “trash can”

Sexual irresponsibility (cheating, not using birth control and/or protection, having multiple partners without being tested for STDs)

Stealing, taking what doesn’t belong to us

Gossiping about people

Parentifying children

Gaslighting people, denying their reality and making them confused

Trying to gain power over people

Looking down on someone because you perceive them to be lesser than you

Talking at people instead of to them

Unhealthy competition

Downplaying someone’s achievements or good qualities to make ourselves feel superior