Dear Amelia:

You are welcome to express your feelings here anytime.

You shared that his parents knew nothing about you, didn’t ask about your plans for the future, didn’t give you the opportunity to compromise with them. Well, you can’t compromise what you cannot change, which is your ethnicity or race. Neither should you compromise these things if you could.

“I feel betrayed by this whole situation”- I understand.

Make sure you limit your people-pleasing behaviors with people so that you don’t betray yourself. You have the personal responsibility to promote your best self-interest, which is to not get involved with people who consider your ethnicity as inferior or undesirable, as well as to be assertive: to state what you need and see to it that what you need is attended to.

If you want to vent again, but you don’t want me to respond with any advice, please let me know (that will be you asserting yourself), and I will accommodate you.

anita