Dear Teak

I dont know exactly what I want to tell him,(he has very well succeeded in gashlighting me tbh)

I keep replaying all the previous events in my head, trying to figure out if it was really me the reason for all this to happen, was he just being a good friend, because he cannot relate to a thing where I felt he was overdoing as a friend

I know you would say  that, the best thing for me is to leave these thoughts and runaway from him as far as possible.

But, maybe I just want him to know

That I genuinely cared abt him and still do, being just friends has nd is never been the real problem for me, but the fact that whther I should trust him with myself.

And I didnt make it clear in the call but I want to now, that forward on , he should not think that its me because of whom this interaction has been on hold. And talk to me for a resolve only when he is ready to stop being clueless and support me through this by taking responsibility for his miscommunication otherwise yes, he can very well expect that I am never coming back  , however much may he mean to me, I am not coming back and there is no way he can expect a resolve

But we can surely stay friendly for the club work, i dont want him to have any hard feelings there

Ugh i dont know what I want to tell him

But its so hard to stop thinking abt this now,

I keep replaying all thr scenes trying to know where did it all go wrong