Thank you @Jay2023. I’m aware it’s not reflection on myself.

Actually, to me now it seems like it was a push-pull game. He was pushing a lot, while I was unsure, encouraging me, initiating conversations, and when I gave in, he started pulling away. I don’t want to play, so if that’s it, I’m not going to push it. I guess, even in past, I’m may be attracted to those games, but I hope I’m now at least more emotionally aware so I can recognize this and stop it. Somehow, knowing I can recognize the game, and it’s my choice whether I want to play or not, makes me feel stronger and confident, realizing I have a control. And I want to choose only what’s healty and mature, not those games.

I don’t rely on tinder as my primary method usually either, I was even unsure because it was a match on tinder. I admit I went on tinder as there were not many others opppurtunites, because of  pandemic, work-home life and  friends in relationships.

I love what you wrote in last part of your reply.  I’m going to take a break now too, not chasing anything, not tryin to replace any loss. As now my thinking of my ex has stopped in the most part, I guess it’s a wonderful opportunity to not be thinking about anyone, which hasn’t happened a long time now for me. I also believe that things will develop, when it’s right time and when we are in good state for that, both for you and me.