Dear Umm:

A second double posting. Sometimes original posters and members who reply miss posts that are submitted at the same time or very close together, so be aware.

“he told me he never gets jealous about his father’s caring and love for his sister”- doesn’t mean he is not jealous. Let’s say as a child, he expressed jealously and any one of his parents told him that it’s not nice to be jealous at one own sister, so wanting to be a good boy, he denied his jealousy to himself, pushing it out of his full awareness.

When he told you that his father took care of his sister a bit more, he said it in a “kind plain tone of voice, but depression or needing for attention was a bit in that tone”- reads to me that he has been indeed jealous, and understandably so, being that as a boy he loved his father very much and wanted more attention than what he got.

It is not promising to the relationship with him that he is not open to attend therapy. No therapy= problems will remain the same.

anita