Home→Forums→Tough Times→wouldn’t be a mercy if i just ended my life?→Reply To: wouldn’t be a mercy if i just ended my life?
so, that was just one bad day, not a dominant experience
it is a dominant experience, bad days for me is like most of the days, but now with meds its much better, hopefully the good days will increase
you have days when you like or love life
*like, never love
days when you feel free (not stuck)?
yes, one of the qualities of bad days for me is worrying about the future (GAD), its something i can not control and it takes the joy of the day, when there is no this, no worry, no anxiety, just peace, that feels so good, i wouldn’t wanna trade this with anything .
when you were typing the post, were you very pessimistic or did you appear more pessimistic than you actually were?
i really can’t remember that day, although i would say i was pessimistic, if i remember correctly, i almost attempted suicide, or a day before it , i was so afraid and so lonely, i feel words can’t describe how bad it was, but i convicted myself that all this will go away if i only do it.
At some time after you submitted that post, away from the computer, on that same day- did you feel better, less pessimistic?
no