since you do have your father’s pension and seem to live a fairly pleasant life

I spend most of it on my medication, actually i never buy anything besides my medication, but thats no excuse

you could always get a temporary job to earn enough for the next session. But you don’t want to.

And add more stress to my life? You don’t understand do you? Im on the edge, anything more would push me, imagine working to pay for more work, for a potential reward, no thanks, and yes i have no desire to heal, and i never will, its not really about the money, its not about anything, i just don’t want to, because its bullsh*t made for norimes, i left those things to norimes,

True self exists – because I’ve experienced it.

Lol, and im the one who dismiss science based on my preference

It’s our essence.

Says?

It’s also where our unique gifts and talents are stored

I wonder where does this come from? God? Destiny? If so and they are uncontrollable, maybe some people have “bad” gifts and talents? But no that doesn’t suit my belief and values, thats a ugly way to look at the world, its all about “pure” love, where does this love come from? You think someone would love you purely? There is always a reason behind this love, a fine example is anita, there was a reason why she “loved” me, because i made her feel something, she loved that feeling, its not about me really, and its never about the other person, people only love because its benefits them, it makes them feel something based on what they didn’t had in thier childhood, there is always a reason, uncontrollable reason for love, and its always about the person childhood, but i understand you won’t argue, i won’t either, im just saying my opinion