Dear sossi:

I am relieved and glad that you posted again, I didn’t know if I will read from you again!

Overall, from having read this recent post and the many posts before, about your work life, reads to me that you are a skillful, talented and very hard working real estate agent who is unfortunately stuck in an aggressive, dog-eat-dog, poor-to-no team work, unjust workplace.

“I think I always thought, if I just work harder, if I just put more effort in it will pay off. If I’m just nice and patient.. “- in a fair, just work environment.. that would work.

“if I try harder, if I just try to squeeze myself into a certain personality maybe the guy wont leave, maybe the boss will treat me with respect, maybe the colleague wont be jealous“- no more squeezing yourself into anything, I hope. There is enough squeezing/ exerting pressure that’s done to you.. no need you add to it!

“My dad raised me to not rock the boat, to keep my head down…it doesnt work“- he raised you wrong then.

“its like the wolves are circling and salivating“- and you are their hoped-for prey. It reminds me of the time more than a year ago when on my walk a coyote stalked me, then ran to my left,  made a turn and faced me. I know that coyotes attack their prey from the front (while wolves do so from the back). So, there I was, potential prey. He was not salivating and did not look like how predators is predicted in those sci-fi movies and cartoons. For the coyote, it was business as usual: he was trying to figure out if it was going to be too much trouble to attack me, if I am too strong and might fight back and injure him. Eventually he moved on, only to stalk me again on my next walk. But on the next walk I carried a weapon of some kind and since then I carry a bear spray on my walks. I wonder if you can do something similar when you encounter the wolves you are dealing with, appear strong, appear like it would be too much trouble to attack you… appear like you would fight back (?)

anita