Hello Ivygrl!

It sounds like you’re dealing a lot. No wonder you’ve been feeling overwhelmed.

Emotions can be challenging for everyone.

As an adult with a mental health condition I found myself frequently crying for 3 hours at a time.

I am more stable now. I believe that it is okay to cry. I found that beating myself up about the behaviour prolonged the episode. Learning to treat myself with compassion and soothing my emotional responses by practicing self-care and boundary setting were key for me to overcome these issues. It takes a lot of time and effort to learn to manage behaviours, so patience with yourself is key.

A therapist might be able to help you develop your emotional regulation skills and come up with coping strategies. You also seem to be quite hard on yourself at least when you’re upset. Perhaps this is something you have learned from others?

Personally, I don’t believe that your carer responded appropriately in the situation you discussed in the library. My understanding is that a carer is supposed to support you, not attempt to punish you. Punishment would typically be a parents job if they perceived that rules had been broken.

Does being around your carer make you anxious? Do you fear upsetting them?

At the moment I would say that some of the behaviours that yourself and others are unhappy with are expected due to your condition. It will take time to overcome. I think it’s really important not to blame yourself, you are a teenager and have a medical condition. Just try and do your best! Maybe set a goal to do a little better each time.

Do you have a plan to help you with school? Perhaps a tutor might be beneficial?

On a happier note, I think it’s a great idea for you to pursue your passions.